Are you trying to understand what you did to deserve the agony and embarrassment of being cheated on? Are you floundering as you try to figure out why your woman cheated on you, and whether you can trust her again?
Here are a few thoughts to help you understand your partner.
Basic Instincts: Sexual Preferences
Women have crazy sexual desires too – just like men do, but few girls are aware and comfortable with their sexuality. In fact, many conservative girls can’t even vocalize their desires; much less analyze them enough to understand their own vagrancies.
These ‘good girls’ might feel awkward enacting fantasies, wild orgies or unique fetishes so rather than shock you and ruin what you share – she may chose to step outside the confines of your committed relationship to fulfill herself.
Or perhaps something is lacking that she can’t pinpoint but subconsciously needs. The problem could be as simple as her having a larger sexual appetite than you.
Damaged Girls: Ego Boosters & Stress Busters
There are myriad subconscious reasons for cheating. An affair can bring a semblance of control to some women, while to others it can be a form of self-release or even a rebellion against the life they lead.
Affairs are tough on the conscience, but they do wonders for the ego and cheating can often be traced back to low self esteem.
But really, does every woman have issues?
No, but chances are – every fourth woman you bump into, does. Why? Statistically, 1 out of every 4 American girls faces sexual abuse at some point.
The most common proven behavioral problems sex abuse victims display as adults, is promiscuity and self-esteem issues. You never know what drives people to do things!
Perhaps it is time to sit your partner down and get to know what she’s thinking rather than reacting to her transgressions.
Desperate Housewives: Life Must Mean More
Sadly, many a girl has cheated simply out of boredom or because she felt neglected. Everyone needs a little excitement. Women are romantic and need drama and grand gestures.
They grow up giddily believing in ‘happily ever after’ followed by visits from the stork, and then the girlish excitement is expected to fade away as the woman becomes a responsible mother. Once the kids fly the coup and hubby goes to work, who does a woman become next?
Women like to be needed. They want it. Perhaps she misses the initial romance and attention. Perhaps she misses her kids. Perhaps she misses all that she could have been in another role.
Avenging Angels: The Dark Side
Spiteful as it may seem, affairs can stem from a need for vengeance. Try and recall if you hurt her in anyway – if you’ve been inattentive, inaccessible, unfaithful, abusive or even just a plain old boor.
An affair might just be her underhanded way of getting back at you. The reason can be as inane as you loving your work more than her, or it might be to remind you that you’re not the only one who can philander.