Love addiction is a tricky thing. You can convince yourself that you just love love. But if your love of love, romance, dating and a bad partner start to interfere with your life, you have to admit that you have a problem. Perhaps the saddest thing about having a love addiction is that it puts a barrier between you and real love. It prevents you from finding a partner with whom you can share a real relationship and true love.
WHAT IS LOVE ADDICTION?
Love addiction comes in a few different forms, but it is a type of behavioral addiction. Unlike a chemical addiction, you aren’t hooked on drugs or alcohol. Like a drug addict, though, you are obsessed with getting your next love fix. This could mean that you are utterly devoted to your current partner, even though your relationship isn’t healthy. You may be strongly attached to him and panic when he leaves or feel devastated if you break up.
Love addiction can also take the form of a romance addiction. You are obsessed with an idealized, romantic version of love. Real love is messy and imperfect, so when a relationship starts to get serious, you bail and find a new object of your obsession. Or, you may have a dating site addiction. You troll Internet dating sites, convinced that you are about to find your true love if you just look at a few more profiles.
LOVE ADDICTION BLOCKS REAL LOVE
Whatever form your addiction takes, it is keeping you from finding true love. If you obsess over one person who doesn’t feel the same way about you, you will never have a satisfying relationship with that person. If you are hooked on the idea of a fairy tale romance, normal and healthy relationships will never make you happy. What you are doing is preventing yourself from finding a lasting, healthy relationship and a person with whom you can share your life.
The good news is that love addiction recovery is possible for anyone. You need to get to the root of your problem and ask yourself why you have these unhealthy ideas about love. Is it because you think that the perfect person, if you can only find him, will solve all your problems? Maybe you have a fear of abandonment left over from your childhood, or you had terrible models for relationships as a child and now you believe in the power of a fantasy of perfect and ideal love.
If you want to know how to overcome love addiction, you need to address these issues that lie at the root of your attitude toward love and relationships. Many people in the same situation find it helpful to see a therapist experienced in working with love addicts. A professional can help you figure out the reasons behind your addiction and can guide you toward making positive changes that will open you up to real love.